Naughty or Nice?
by pandorasnotebook
Summary: The Cullens decide which of them are naughty and nice for the Christmas season.Oneshot goodness!


**Naughty or Nice?**

Twas the night before Christmas and all through the Cullen's house…

_Dingdong._

The doorbell echoed eerily through the halls.

"It's Bella!"

Alice yelled from the living room.

Edward rolled his topaz eyes. Who else would it be?

He flung the door open but whatever greeting he had planned was whipped completely from his mind when he saw what awaited him.

Bella and Rosalie stood in the doorway each dressed sensually in matching outfits of red mini skirts and revealing sweaters. Black boots crept up their legs over green tights, matching the large Santa Clause belts slung across their hips. Rosalie had tinsel at the base of her high ponytails. Bella had tinkling bells. They were naughty but beautiful elves straight from the North Pole.

Edward blinked. His usually focused mind clouded.

Bella looked a little uncomfortable. She tugged nervously on the edge of her skirt.

"You better watch out!" Rosalie suddenly sang.

"You better not cry!" Bella joined in.

"You better not pout we're telling you why!"

"Santa Clause is comin to town!"

Emmett, apparently hearing the commotion from upstairs, came down for a look. He stood in the doorway and gaped at the two.

"He's making a list." Bella continued. "Checking it twice."

"Gonna see that Emmett and Edward have been naughty not nice." Rosalie held out the last note.

They finished together in perfect harmony. "Santa Clause is comin to town!"

Rosalie unfurled a scroll of paper. On it was written-

Naughty list:

Edward Cullen

Emmett Cullen

"Looks like some people here have been very, very naughty." Rosalie said, smiling.

Bella blushed magnificently.

Suddenly Emmett and Rosalie were in each other's arms.

Bella's blushes deepened. She got up the courage to finally look at Edward.

He was hardly holding back a smile.

"Bella you look ridiculous." His smile broke through. "In a strangely appealing way."

He pulled her to him roughly. The bells in her hair tinkled delightfully. "Remind me never to let Rosalie buy you clothes." He gave her a kiss, like she likes, the ones with less control. Bella was not the only one struggling for breath.

"Then again…" Edward began as he played with the belt and studied her more closely.

They were interrupted at that very moment when the door opened. Carlisle walked into the hall, saw the couples, blinked once and walked back the way he had come.

Edward chuckled as he led Bella into the living room.

Alice was on her tiptoes, balancing precariously on the top step of a ladder. Her delicate arms reached out to put a huge star on the top of the biggest tree Bella had ever seen.

Jasper was sitting in an oversized armchair, reading a book with deep interest.

Eight stockings were lined up along the mantle over a crackling fire.

It was the scene of a perfect Christmas. Like you would see on an Old Navy commercial.

"Merry Christmas Eve!" Bella yelled happily as she entered this scene.

Alice looked down and let out a small "Eeek!" before speeding out of the room.

Jasper blinked, staring at Bella. He opened his mouth, then closed it, then opened and closed it again. Like a fish out of water.

"JASPER!" Edward boomed. "Control your thoughts! Alice is your wife!"

"Alice?" Jasper repeated dimly. "Bella?"

A moment later Alice came back dressed in a very similar outfit to Bella and Rosalie except with a Santa hat on her head. He clothes had a strange look though and it took Bella a moment to realize that she had made them in the few moments that she had been gone.

Rosalie and Emmett followed close behind her.

The whole family sat around the living room on various sofas and armchairs.

Alice added Jaspers name to the naught list with a flourish and was about to tuck it away when Jasper stopped her.

"What is Edward doing on the naught list!?" He laughed. "Edward is a prude! Edward is moral!"

"Yes, I think that I should be taken off and Rosalie should be put on."

"Yes!" Rosalie punched the air, triumphant at her placement on the list

"Okay…"Jasper muttered, pulling out two clean pieces of paper out of a nearby drawer and labeling them Naughty and Nice respectively. "Lets start with the obvious ones. Rosalie is on the Naughty list."

Rosalie smiled from Emmett's lap.

"And Emmett."

"Emmett is only a perv because Rosalie is his wife." Edward argued.

"It doesn't matter whose fault it is." Alice piped in. "He is what he is."

Emmett and Rosalie looked unsure of whether this was a compliment so they remained silent.

"Next, Alice."

"Nice!" Everyone said at once.

"Ummm…Edward."

There was a silence at this.

"Nice." Emmett finally said.

"He was more naughty than nice last night. Weren't you Eddy?" Bella said, playing with the collar of his shirt.

"Bella, what the hell are you talking about." Edward sighed.

"OOOHHHH!" Emmett roared over him. " WHAT IS THIS, EDDY!"

"Bella you are being ridiculous." Edward said, exasperated.

"That's not what you said last night, Edward"

"WHAT WERE YOU DOING LAST NIGHT?!?!"

"I was hunting with you, Emmett. Remember?"

"I recall nothing of the sort."

"Silence everyone!" Jasper shouted.

And there was complete silence.

"Edward is on the nice list."

Edward smiled at this. "I think it should be your turn now, Jasper."

"Fine. My turn."

"Naughty." Edward said immediately.

"Nice." Bella said indignantly.

"Naughty!"

"Nice!"

"Naughty!"

"Nice!"

"Think of his life before coming to us! He killed vampires and humans on cold blood! You're trying to tell me that that's nice?"

"This is making me feel all warm and fuzzy about myself." Jasper muttered. "Self-esteem, anyone?"

"Fine." Bella said grumpily. "Naughty."

Upon that revelation the room became suddenly tense. An intense debate was about to begin.

"Bella's turn." Jasper said, his excitement contagious.

"Nice." Alice and Emmett took their side immediately, as though they had already thought long and hard on this subject.

"Naughty." Edward said.

"WOAH!" Yelled Emmett again. "WHAT MAKES YOU SAY THAT!? I think Edward still has a chance to redeem himself and join the extreme coolness of-." His voice lowered to a conspiratorial whisper. "The naughty list."

"You have never seen Bella trying to be persuasive." Edward shuddered. "Or heard what she wants to do before…before the marriage."

Emmett adopted his golf announcers voice and muttered, " Not only is Bella naughty for unprudeing Edward but she also goes against the Catholic Church with premarital sex. What are we going to do with this girl?

"But Bella did not have a boyfriend until she met Edward. That has to count for some nice." Alice argued. "She's also still a virgin at 18… which is a rare thing in this day and age. And she has never killed anyone as far as we know…which is more than any of us could say!"

"Alice Cullen argues for the defendant. Will we find Bella not guilty of naughtiness?" Emmett continued.

"Shut up, Emmett!" Edward roared. "Bella is naughty- end of argument!"

Jasper wrote Bella's name carefully under his own and then sat back to admire his work.

"What do you think about Carlisle and Esme?" He mused.

The room burst into laughter.

"NO!" Carlisle burst in through the side door. "Don't bring me into this."

Twas the night before Christmas in the Cullen's house as Jasper secretly put Carlisle's name on his naughty list.

* * *

**This was my Christmas special! I hope everyone enjoyed it!**

**It is dedicated to anyone who goes overboard in decorateing the outsides of their house...i don't but i like to see the peoples houses who do. **

**Please review! I'll give you sugar cookies shaped like Santa! (actually i wont but i did make some today. they are yummy!) Tell me if you liked it or not. If not what can i do to improve?**

**OH! and I don't own any of Twilight...but wouldn't that be cool if i did! Thats what you could get me for X-mas! The rights to Twilight!**

**MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!**


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